My Tips for Emotional Strength

My Tips for Emotional Strength


Ask for what you want, set your own boundaries and have your own beliefs and opinions.   Being yourself will boost your self esteem, your confidence and your creativity.  A lot of this comes with age but speaking up as we grow older and wiser does really enable us to grow into the person we really want to be.  Standing up to your values, wearing the clothes you want, being free to choose and living the life you want gives you this strength.


Spending time alone and being individual is wonderful but to love and to be loved can make us more whole as a person and relating to partners can make us happier, make our experiences of life more meaningful and also feel supported too knowing we are loved, in the way we want to be loved  by another.  Nobody is ever perfect but to recognise the qualities your partner can bring to your life can be really powerful and make your life more fulfilling by sharing what each other can bring to the relationship.


To some degree you can re-invent yourself.  You grow up in a certain environment but at the end of the day once you experience full self awareness you can take control and be whoever you want to be.  You can reduce your emotional distress by living exactly the way that suits you.  For example, you know what makes you feel calm? what really makes you happy?  You can eliminate what you find stressful, what is making you miserable and unfulfilled.  What makes you feel accomplished on a day to day basis, what really makes your life meaningful?  There are many ways you can approach this by really studying your values.  What is really important to you?


Overthinking situations really can take a hold on your mind.  Taking control of thoughts that do not serve us are just causing us emotional distress.   Next time you get a thought that really doesn’t serve you, pause and re-think and talk to yourself.  Question the thought ……. how can I state this more positively?   It takes practice to do this but once you start to take control of unwanted thoughts it really is so empowering. 


Keep dwelling on the past can actually become depressing and you can find your mind going round in vicious circles. Obviously the past is history and it cannot be changed, although at times it can stay with us, especially if it has been disturbing.  We can nevertheless try to be positive and move on with what makes us feel better now and try to let go, as best you can, of negativity from the past.


Anxiety can make everyday tasks of living much harder.  There are many techniques e.g breathing techniques, positive affirmations, relaxation techniques and tools of the mind that will make all the difference.  I am currently reading a book called The Anxiety Solution by Chloe Brotheridge which is full of strategies to help to calm your mind.  There are some really good tools and exercises in here that you can practice.


You can wake in the morning and decide what is really important to you.  If wandering round the house makes you feel miserable and non productive then to boost your mood do something that is going to make you feel really happy and more productive.  You are in control of starting each day with something positive or split your day into portions and do a mixture of different tasks that you can make more fun.  You can reduce your emotional distress by taking on new hobbies and also learning something new or  ongoing exciting projects that inject some energy into your day to day life.


So taking action on the circumstances that are within our control.  If we really hate our job, then we have the power to change, we may need to learn some extra skills to change career but there are so many opportunities around and even some courses are free.   If we want to meet new people there are a huge amount of opportunities these days, its just a case of working out what we fancy trying, taking someone along with you if you dont want to go alone and working out a plan.  Sometimes these things really are obvious but many of us do get stuck in circumstances that we really dont want to be in and cannot see a way to move forward.  Often breaking things down into small steps and taking things one step at a time can help.  It’s just building up confidence slowly until you feel brave to go for it.


“We all make choices, but in the end our own  choices make the person we are today”